waiter: hi what would you like to drink?
me: coke please
waiter: sorry we only have meth is that fine?
When you and you’re friend are trying to do something cool to impress someone and they fuck up
If you own a dog, please share.
Even if you don’t own a dog, please share
If you own a human, please don’t own a human.
can a dinosaur even get more fuckin rad?
you bet jurassican
i am so impressed by that dinosaur and that pun congratulations
imagine if china, while they’re up on the moon, decides to knock down the US flag or whatever just to say ‘screw you’ and its like, what are we gonna do? spend a couple million just to fly some craft up to the moon and re-erect the flag? the whole scenario would be petty and that’s hilarious
i have lived in america my entire life and i am 100% sure we would do exactly that